Why are the Men’s Toilets So Close Together?

by Sanctified Brother

Toilets Too Close Together

I wonder if the plumbing crew spent time checking their work. I wonder if they looked at their sketches first. I wonder if these were grown men who installed these stalls. I wonder if the person responsible is available to speak with because I’d love to sit down with him (or her?) over a nice smoothie and tactfully ask, “Why are the men’s toilets so close together?”

Men don’t like the idea of sharing and they don’t like the idea of sharing personal space. Neither do men like the idea of going to the bathroom and standing next to someone else and trying to situate themselves, elbows jostling for the optimal placement for convenience in unzipping, unbuckling, standing back to avoid splashing, and trying not to let cold and wet porcelain touch their body parts. That’s nasty.

I sure hope nobody squeezes in there and starts peeping left and right. They might have to lay “holy hands” on the perp and throw him out…